For far too long I felt like I was a huge disappointment to God, that I was constantly letting Him down. I grew up with three brothers who always picked on me, not that I am blaming them for my disfunction. I just always felt like a screw-up. I was anything but graceful. I have so many scars on my knees from constantly falling down, that a guy in college asked me if I’d ever had knee surgery! I chipped my teeth, broke my arm, busted my lip and head on various occasions. I'm sure I kept my mother on her knees!
When I would pray, I felt like God saw me as a screw-up. I was trapped by this thinking for
many years, until I studied Romans 3:23-24 which says, “For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard (we all hear this a lot) YET God, (don't you love the yet God parts) with undeserved kindness, declares that we are righteous. He did this through Christ Jesus when he freed us from the penalty for our sins.”
God declares us as righteous, not because of what we have done, but because of what Jesus has done for us on the cross. When God looks at us, He sees us through the blood of Jesus. He did this out of love for us, not because of anything we did to earn it.
Not only is God not disappointed in us, we are pleasing to Him. Have you ever had the thought, "God loves me, but I'm pretty sure He doesn't like me." Well, there is no Scripture to back up that line of thinking. You're believing a lie. Sorry to sound so harsh - it's just the truth!
Ephesians 1:5 says, "God decided in advance to adopt us into His own family by bringing us to Himself through Jesus Christ. This is what He wanted to do, and it gave Him great pleasure." God takes pleasure in being in relationship with you. He takes pleasure in calling you His own. What an amazing concept.
The reason God sent Jesus was because He wanted to be in a relationship with us. 2 Corinthians 5:19 says, “For God was in Christ, reconciling the world to himself, no longer counting people's sins against them. And he gave us this wonderful message of reconciliation.”
Reconcile means to restore a friendship, to cause people to become friendly again after an argument or disagreement. God went through great lengths to restore His relationship with mankind. God is not mad at you and He is not holding your sins against you. Receive the Father's love - that requires faith!
That is such an amazing truth, that God is no longer counting our sins against us. If God isn't bringing up all the messes we have made, then we need to let ourselves go and walk free. God is not disappointed in you. He loves you just as much as He loves Jesus - let that sink in for a few minutes :)